This is basically what kept going through in my head yesterday after an asthma attack hit middle of a Spartan Saturday outdoor workout.
“…remember why you started”.
I am fortunate to have my asthma very controlled and it rarely acts up – mostly only when I am getting sick. And I was starting to get a minor cold. That feeling of not being able to breathe is never something I can get used to even after years of asthma. After the attack, I could have quit. My team and coach wouldn’t have judged me. It was a pretty severe attack. But I knew once I had it under control that I could go on and finish if I slowed down and controlled my breathing. So I did it.
It took me pretty much double the time I normally spend on a Saturday workout but I did not quit. I found even trying to slow down was hard for me. I like to take challenges and push myself. I had to remind myself all throughout the long finish of the exercises, that today my challenge was not to push hard. But it was to simply finish the workout.
These workouts are more than just helping me become a healthier person physically. They are helping realize myself mentally too. For me, it isn’t all just about overcoming the obstacles or improving in the workouts. It is how the training for all of this is changing how I think. My brain thinks a lot like the image posted above from Spartan’s Facebook page.
Yesterday, my team and my coach helped push me through. When I decided to continue, they didn’t stop me. Not everyone knew at time that it had happened. Just my coach and a few who saw it happen. I know they watched me to make sure I wasn’t overdoing it and if at any moment, it looked like I was, I know they would have kindly insisted I stop. But when they saw that I was able to continue, very slowly, I heard words of encouragement. I was given high fives. On my last round, I remember hearing my coach say “Just take one step”. I remember laughing sarcastically in my head “I think you mean, just take one breath…” Humour helps when I struggle. But I took one breath and one step. I finished. One hour 47 minutes. Usually a Saturday workout takes one hour or one hour 15 minutes. It may have not been my “fastest” or my “strongest” workout. I may not have had a “PR” – personal record. However, after this workout, I teared up a bit as I felt immensely proud of myself and felt like I just accomplished the best workout ever. Finishing this workout felt better than any other PB or PR I have yet earned. It reminded me of the reasons why I started and why I have been so fortunate to change my life. I never gave up. From the moment I was given a reason to start (testing pre-diabetic in August 2013), I have continued to take one more step and I will continue to take one more stop for the rest of my life. My end goal isn’t just a goal weight anymore. My end goal is a continuous goal of health and fitness and challenging myself. My end goal is continuing to transform myself physically and mentally. My end goal is never quitting.
Thank you so much to my coach, Riley Nadoroznick, yesterday for sticking with me until I finished. Even though it took a very long time. I know you said I didn’t have to thank you but you have a life too and yet, you waited. Also thanks to my teammates yesterday. I may not have replied to all of your encouraging words as I was focusing on my breathing but I couldn’t have found a better family to challenge myself with. If you are local to Regina, and ready to also take that step, check out Conviction Fitness one day. Riley offers so much for people. Online programming for busy people and non local people too! Spartan Pro and Spartan Lite programming… Unfortunately, I think the March/April program is full or almost full but here’s the website to check out and has contact info if you are ready for a new challenge: http://convictionfitness.ca/