Pace, Pride, & Priorities

I’ll be honest. It’s been a rough week of running. My body seems to be fighting me. I feel heavy and slow. No…not sick or injured. But I don’t have the normal energy I am use to feeling in my runs and during the day. The snooze button has been hit way more often than usual. Maybe it’s how busy I am right now. End of school year (hard and busy time of year as a teacher) and the excitement and planning of our summer trip has consumed me.

My running pace was typically 7:30-8:45 km/minute – I run 1.3 km and walk 100 metres. Something that it took me a year and a half to get to. But since Sunday, I cannot get my mind and body to stick with the intervals. I’m taking double the walk breaks I normally do.

So today… I went for a run before heading to the final part of my first aid training. And I said no matter what, I’d stick to the intervals and I’d see an under 9 minute per km pace and get 6km done today.

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Ha… I didn’t. And not for lack of trying. I just couldn’t do it. So I was pretty hard on myself mentally and felt the lowest I have in awhile.

All while I was showering and getting ready for the day, I started second guessing myself and belittled all the big life improvements I’ve worked hard on the last 2.5 years. Then I saw this on my time hop app:

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The me who used to be 60 pounds heavier, a lot less healthy, and very untrained beginner runner had a way more positive attitude than the me this week.

I can’t give up. I’ll get back out there tomorrow…and the next day. Maybe my pace will return and maybe it may even improve. Maybe it won’t. Maybe I’m getting old and slowing down. (KIDDING!!)

But the point is that I’m out there each day running and/or walking. Each day I’m bettering myself, even if not my pace. Slow is better than stationery.

Besides…if I don’t keep getting out there, I’d miss moments like this:

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And views like this don’t care about my pace or pride. They just encourage me to keep shining and keep going. 

Balance

Oops. I caved. I’ve made numerous homemade healthy freezer meals the past few months. But tonight I just wanted a cheesy slice of delivery pizza. It’s been a craving for awhile.

And Brad is no help…he loves pizza more than me. Instead of “no honey…we will feel better eating the homemade freezer casserole you worked hard to make”, I think he inwardly cheers when I say “How about delivery tonight?” It is rare when we eat out. I think he knows to jump at the chance when I’m willing to go astray from my grip on our meal plan.

So I eat 3 slices of pizza and I feel like I’m going to burst. I used to be able to crush half a pizza on my own easy. But pizza craving has been satisfied. I’m in bed at 8:30pm and if I get a good sleep, I’ll make a compromise of running 6k instead of 4k in the morning and I will have salad for lunch…

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First aid…

I am finding anything I can do except the 4-6 hour long online first aid training I must complete before Friday’s hands on training. So why not start a blog?

I really wish I would have started one when I first changed my life. Oh, the stories I would have loved to look back at. Oh well. Better late than never.

Blogging became an interest for me after I spent time going back into old childhood journals for my grad studies paper. It’s my first class. I am working towards a Masters of Education in Curriculum & Instruction. It is nice that university offers course route option. I plan to do mine by completing the 10 classes instead of a thesis route.

Back to journals – the childhood diaries and journals reminded me how much I loved writing. I wanted to get back into it. Plus – it might help me reduce the amount I post to Facebook. Which I always consider getting rid of as it is such a time suck. So here goes blogging. Blogging will give me more time to reflect and write, instead of simply just posting simple posts or photos.

The best reason to blog besides to humour myself and my readers (if I even have any) with chronicles of my running attempts, my successes and failures of teaching, the hair pulling fun of grad classes, my foodie obsession, and my addiction to my lab who has me wrapped around her paw? To blog about the bucket list item that my husband and I are finally crossing off this summer.

Europe all of July! Paris, Nice, Munich, Vienna, various unknown places in Ireland (Shannon for sure), London, Bath, York, and Edinburgh! I cannot wait. And blogging will be a great way to keep in touch with family and friends about our adventures while away.

But I should go…first aid is calling me back. I really need to know what to look for in nose bleeds – their answer is shocking “blood coming from the nose”. I never would have thought to look for that!